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ur mom hands u a glass of orange juice. u take a sip. its not orange juice. its stirred egg yolks. u spit them all out. u ask ur mom why. she turns around. its not ur mom. its me. ur mom is gone. im ur mother now
these old spice commercials have been getting really crazy lately
nothing is more satisfying than someone walking right past ur hiding spot in hide and seek
how old are you
"thatkilljoy" living up to the url i see
You can’t escape followers, i’ve already glued the door shut
Nice try followers, but I replaced all the glass with rubber.
Too late followers, I’ve already cloooggged all the toooiiiiillleeeetttts
if you’re reading this that means you’re following me congratulations on doing one right thing in your life
how do people even find my blog? who are you people? where did you come from? where did you go? where did you come from cotton eyed joe?
dean did u really turn on the gps on cas’s phone did u rEALLY
act more like a concerned boyfriend i dare u u lovesick fuckin dork
I think “dildo” is a perfectly acceptable insult. Like, I’d call you a dick but you’re not real enough.
*dude puts his mouth around his bros dick* bro, im not actually gay unless i suck it. i never sucked it. its a metaphor, see: you put the dick right between your teeth, but you dont blow it. a metaphor bro
Typing an essay due tomorrow at 3 in the morning
never seen anything more accurate
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